The Eeyore Cloud

Ah the good life ey. Where you can wake up every day and feel wonderful. You can go to work, be passionate and skilled at your job, interact with work mates in a balanced healthy way.

You go home, prepare a healthy exciting meal for your family and then do something productive and stimulating after dinner. You go to bed, have a great conversation with your partner, have some intimacy, roll over and go to sleep.

You balance life, work, friends and when stress and problems come up, you deal with them all efficiently and with no fuss.

 

But then there are those other people, you know, the ones that are just SO ANNOYING!

They whine on Facebook, they share their problems, they have good days and bad days, gosh, everything is always a drama. They are never happy. Their relationships are just so shit. Why don't they just leave that guy/girl, if he/she is that bad. Their life is just ALWAYS so hard (to listen to). Why don't they just get their shit together ? It is just not that hard.

Don't they get it?

The perfect world.

Well, fine people of the world. Here is the reality. Everyone wants to get it. Everyone wants to have a mind that is serene, sane and working in their own best interest.

But the reality is, if you look at statistics, there are a hell of alot of people on this beautiful planet that are going stark raving mad. Insane. Loosing their shit.

People are killing themselves every single day. Not because of the Wall Street Crash, but because their minds have tormented themselves so much that the only relief they think they are ever going to get in their life time, is death. Ah the sweet sound of serenity in death.

I cringe when I hear people lament... Oh that is so selfish. The poor people that are left behind. What these people don't understand is that GRIEF at the death of a loved one, does not even measure up against the pain of insanity. The 24/7 torture of a insane, depressed mind. Grief is like a wound, it heals over time. We are made to grieve and move on. Insanity is difficult to heal. Serenity of the mind is possible, but for some impossible.

What is insanity in this day and age. It is the torment of the mind. It is manic depression. It is anxiety. Let me paint a picture for you.

Ever felt so sick you don't want to get out of bed? Your body aches, you are exhausted. You have no energy. Everything is just too hard. Some people only experience this when you get the flu. For some, this is every day. When getting out of bed is a challenge. When talking to people normally requires great energy and focus. The sun is shining, they cant see it. They are surrounded by love and they cant see it. All they can see is that big cloud over their head.

Social interactions are exhausting. There are no hobbies, no interests, no exercise. This is called Social Anorexia. You heard the saying " I just want to hide under a rock"

There are so many people out there hiding under rocks. Confusion reigns. Why do some peoples lives seem so perfect? The reality is, there are alot of people out there struggling.. Silently struggling with this pain in their minds. Not living up to the perfection required of the world. Hide your shame. Don't voice it. We don't want to hear you whine.

But the experts, they are quick to label people. Now social media is the in thing and so big in the world, they are quick to throw shade over those who are finding their voices. Because Social Media brings out the social anorexic people. It gives them a connection. I am seeing more and more, people relating to other people through social media where in the past they would not have been able to connect.

And yet, Social Media is being labelled as unhealthy. We are hearing all the negativity about social media but not the positivity.

People that struggle need to find like minded people. They need to know they are not alone. They don't want sympathy. They just need to know that they are not freaks, they are not being judged. They need to find brothers and sisters that can say. 'Mate- I relate. I hear your pain and I share it'.

That is why I started my blog. I want those out there to know. I am a living breathing example of what is really going on in the world. My life is, on the outside perfect. I have three stunningly beautiful children. They are healthy, intelligent and very grounded. But they are real. They have their fears, they have their foibles and some swear way too much. I have an amazing job. In a beautiful location. My work place is stunning. I sell outstanding wine. I work with just the loveliest people. I have a beautiful home. It is mine. I am a girl. I own my very own 6 acres of property. Me. I . Myself. (oh and the bank) . I do all the jobs on my own and I manage it on my own. I have a normal family. We have had our ups and downs. Some talk . Some don't. But my parents are still alive and I am lucky. I have adorable pets, dogs that forgive me my everything. That just are so delighted to see me every day. I have lovely friends. I have a gorgeous boyfriend. He is smart, handsome, kind and loving. I have had so much love given to me.

But until recently my life was a blur. I saw nothing. I didn't not see any of the above. My mind hijacked. And some days it still is. Fear hijacked my mind. No amount of love given to me was seen, felt , heard. I felt loveless, valueless and I failed to see my own worth. I still struggle to get out of bed some mornings but I am fortunate that small things flick the switch for me on most days. Because I need to shine for the world. I need to face the world with a smile. I need to face the public and smile, be vivacious and outgoing. I need to play act for the world that life is wonderful. While deep inside every ounce of energy is being sucked out of me.

I go home, exhausted and fall in a heap. Why am I sharing this? Well not for sympathy. Because part of my healing is being open and honest. And part of who I am is to help people. Reach out to those in pain and share my hope and my love. Because I know what it is like to feel isolated in a world of "perfect people".

If one person can connect and feel hope and love from this, then it helps me grow. It takes me out of self and makes my life a little more sane. It offers me serenity.

So thank you for your compassion today. Thank you for remembering, if you don't have the Eeyore cloud over your head, that your lack of judgement and criticism means alot to the people that do.

And I appreciate you xo

#bodymindandsoul #depression #RUOK #empathy #anxiety