Second hand rose...

Second hand rose

When I was a child, all I ever wore were 'hand me down' clothes, or hideous home made outfits (don't tell my mum that I said that!)

If they were cool, I was happy, but that was a rarity. They weren't the latest fashions and they were usually a decade out of date. I must be honest and say I did have some personal favourite second hand clothes and boy did I love them.

Then recently I heard that clothes, along with houses, jewellery and other things when re used, carry the original and subsequent owners energy. If it was bad energy, then you would be wearing it. Uggh !

New clothes are such a  buzz for me. Except that, the moment they are worn once, they are no longer new and they feel like 'hand me down' clothes again.

I have developed some sort of 'thing' for brand new clothes. And the crazy thing is, so has one of my daughters. So much so that I have heard her say, "I've worn this already, I don't want to wear it again"

I cringed, but I totally relate. Trouble is, I am not Paris Hilton and I don't have the income to support my Princess like clothing prejudice! I am the same with meals and so are my children, left over's are SO yesterday. But that is another subject.

So I therefore have acquired a rather large wardrobe. Nothing spectacular like designer brands, just run of the mill simple, sensible clothes, but way way too many. And I am a hoarder. The times I would throw out clothes were few and far between and they were only motivated by weight gain (which I lost) and style changes (which reverted back- damn cause I had some killer outfits)

Then recently I discovered loved ones like wearing my clothes. Of course because I didn't have alot as a child, at first I struggled to share, but more and more now I feel the extension of love when my daughters or partner wear my clothes.

Because for so long I have struggled to feel my own self worth, respect myself and expect respect, I failed to see signs of love coming my way. I failed to see signs of compassion, acceptance and the love in the gift of sharing. I spent my whole life isolating from connection, close friendships and giving and receiving love.

One important thing I have been learning recently is the joy of loving with no expectations, rewards or feedback. It is hard, without a doubt, but to know that your higher power loves you unconditionally and you love yourself unconditionally, is so freeing.

So now, when a loved one wears something from my wardrobe, I see love in sharing. I feel better about the 'bigger than normal wardrobe' because I am sharing it.  I hope my special loved ones feel my loving energy wrap around them. Unconditional warm, caring love. And when I wear something of theirs, I feel their presence and their loving energy wrap around me.